By Jamie Munoz
Most leaders I know genuinely want their teams to feel appreciated, and they also want to feel appreciation from their teams.
They care deeply about building healthy cultures. They want recognition to be meaningful, not part of ticking boxes. And they’re willing to adjust how they show up if it helps their people feel more valued.
At the same time, leadership is still a relationship between humans — not roles or because your list of accountabilities says so.
And like any healthy relationship, appreciation works best when it flows both ways.
A Brief Foundation: Workplace Love Languages
The concept of Workplace Love Languages comes from Dr. Gary Chapman and Dr. Paul White, authors of The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace. Their work builds on Chapman’s original Love Languages framework and adapts it for professional environments.
They identified five primary ways people tend to feel most appreciated at work:
Words of Affirmation – Praise, encouragement, acknowledgment
Quality Time – Focused attention, listening, connection
Acts of Service – Help, support, removing obstacles
Tangible Gifts – Thoughtful gifts, bonuses, meaningful tokens
Physical Environment / Flexibility – Autonomy, trust, supportive work conditions
Most people have one or two preferences that resonate most strongly. When appreciation is expressed in those ways, it lands more deeply.
For example: my favorite ways to show love at work to anyone on my team at Catalyst is Acts of Service and Tangible Gifts. I get so much joy out of thoughtfully identifying a gift that I want to give to a team member on their birthday or for a special milestone at work. I feel fulfilled and like I am providing value when I am able to provide an act of service of helping any team member solve an issue by giving them time and attention with personalized support. I am also totally aware of how people on my team like to be shown love at work with a hand written card or personalized video telling them in specific words the impact they make or how I appreciate them with words of affirmation.
This framework has helped many leaders become more thoughtful and effective in how they recognize their team members.
Appreciation Is Relational, Not Transactional
Where the conversation can sometimes feel incomplete is when appreciation is framed as a one-directional responsibility.
In healthy organizations, appreciation isn’t something leaders do to their teams.
It’s something people practice together.
Leaders benefit from understanding how their team members prefer to receive appreciation and vice versa. That awareness builds trust, engagement, and clarity with a sense of true teamwork.
At the same time, leaders bring their own communication style, intentions, and ways of expressing care. Honoring that doesn’t diminish the team experience, it humanizes leadership.
The real opportunity lives in the middle ground.
Open Communication: The Foundation That Makes This Work
Mutual appreciation doesn’t happen without open communication.
When teams feel safe talking about:
What helps them feel valued
When recognition lands or misses
What their work love language is
…appreciation stops being guesswork.
Leaders can model this by:
Asking what the team members work love languages are
Sharing their own work love language preferences
This transparency reduces misinterpretation and builds trust. Open communication turns workplace love languages from a concept into a shared language.
This can be simple – don’t make it weird and yes, you actually do need to care about wanting to know these things about your people. We ask for these preference during our onboarding at Catalyst and ask our team to review and update all of their work info, preferences, assessments, etc. annually to keep it up to date.
Celebrations: Where Culture Becomes Collective
Celebration is one of the most underutilized tools in healthy cultures.
When teams celebrate:
Wins
Milestones
Effort (not just outcomes)
Growth and learning
Exhibiting Core Values
Brand aligned behavior
…appreciation naturally becomes more aligned and integrated, not just top-down.
Celebrations:
Give team members space to recognize one another also
Normalize appreciation beyond leadership
Reinforce shared values and behaviors
Create moments of connection and pride
Whether it’s a team meeting shout-out (throw it into your Headlines in your L10 if public recognition is ok), a shared Slack channel (what we use this at Catalyst!), a milestone ritual, or a simple pause to acknowledge progress in a Same Page — celebration makes appreciation visible and collective.
What This Looks Like in Healthy Practice
1. Shared Language
Teams talk openly about appreciation preferences without rigidity or pressure.
2. Thoughtful Adjustment
Leaders stretch their style where it’s reasonable, and teams learn to recognize care even when it looks different than expected.
3. Collective Recognition
Appreciation flows peer-to-peer, team-to-leader, and leader-to-team.
4. Mutual Respect
People show up as humans first, roles second.
Why This Matters for Leaders
As leaders, our role isn’t to get this perfectly right.
It’s to create the conditions where appreciation can exist organically and flow both ways. When appreciation is supported by communication and celebration:
Culture feels grounded rather than performative
Relationships strengthen
People assume positive intent more often
Trust becomes part of the operating system
That’s not about lowering standards. It’s about increasing connection.
Be the Catalyst® Perspective
At Catalyst Integrators, we see the strongest cultures built by leaders who understand that culture isn’t created through top-down initiatives alone.
It’s created when leaders can be the catalyst:
Invite conversation
Model appreciation
Encourage celebration
And make space for shared humanity
That’s how appreciation becomes sustainable and not dependent on one person or role.
Workplace love languages aren’t about perfect customization or top-down only recognition. They’re about relationship, communication, and celebration. When appreciation flows in all directions, supported by openness and shared wins, culture becomes something people feel, not something leaders manage.
And that’s where healthy, lasting cultures are built.
